Should I stay or should I go now?

Pffffh, what a crazy ride. Once you are on your path of transformation and ascension, nothing is the way it used to be anymore. You are pushed forward relentlessly. Often, you just feel that you would rather just hide under the blankets until this dense period is over. Just to be followed by a bliss wave that takes us up into the sky to crash again. “What a freakshow” is all you can think in that phase. You are changing so quickly and moving forward so fast, that you can hardly keep up with the changes going on. You feel different from day to day and yet at the same time you feel that you are not able to take any decisions. “Should I stay or should I go now” is the common theme in this shift in consciousness. From fear to love. From control to trust. From trying to allowing. 

Although you know deep down inside it has to be that way, in order to live a new lifestyle based on this new universal unconditional code,  it can just feel like too much to take sometimes. All you want is go home, or exit to not have to feel anything anymore at all. After every big block cleared out of the way, there seems to be more. “Every time I thought I had figured it all out, I had to learn and accept: No, there is more”. These words of Dolores Cannon are echoing this experience. In addition, the physical symptoms, the despair and the nagging question of “What’s the point of all of this? Why did I sign up for this. Does it ever stop?” are accompanying you. This often comes in combination with the feeling of being useless and the whole thing you do is pointless anyways, just to be followed by the next wave of bliss and feeling this planet is the best place to be in ever. No wonder it feels like losing your mind. And… that is exactly what is happening as it is needed to enter 5D: We need to lose our ego mind and transform it into a free spirit: A mind that no longer judges, worries, doubts, interprets or sticks to certain beliefs, but only perceives and focuses.

“In order to enter 5D we need to lose our ego mind and transform it into a free spirit: A mind that no longer judges, worries, doubts, interprets or sticks to certain beliegs, but only perceives and focuses”

Nevertheless, your mind is still trying to make sense of what is going on, and of course it is not capable to do so because it cannot process that amount of energy and data that is coming through your heart, and with the intense light influxes we have been experiencing lately. You are pushed to your very borders of what you can still bear.

The world and humanity have entered the great chaos to prepare for the big shift upwards in frequency. And you are a brave part of it. It is so important to detach your personal stories from these sensations, knowing that this is just collective energy running through you to be transformed through your heart center. Your body will get used to this function of transforming energy. It serves as potential for you to release the bits that are still stuck in your own system.   Although it seems like you are useless and doing nothing out of a societal and physical point of view, from an energetic perspective, you are working 24/7, shifting energies non-stop. So really – energetically speaking… lying at home and feeling like sh*t is really a big service to the collective and important work! The more you embrace that job and the emotions that come with it, the more you are grateful and compassionate with yourself and others, the quicker you transmute the energies to a higher level, not only for yourself but also for the planet and humanity as a whole. Just continue to calm down your mind and come into the now by using your senses. Perceive your environment by touching, feeling, smelling, tasting, hearing and seeing. Then, the ego-mind automatically takes a break as it is not able to exist in the NOW.

Triggers, Projections and Victimhood

Triggers are everywhere when you move closer to 5D. You are now entering the gateway with the highest energetic potential available to get things cleared and dissolved. In addition, you are permanently confronted with the collective fear energies and you are picking them up. These are all old energies of fighting, freezing, appeasing and running away. When this happens, we tend to fall into old patterns, are projecting the intense collective energies on people that are closest to us and can easily lose ourselves in victimhood. In these moments it is really helpful to take a step back and realize, that the only person responsible is you. And you are the only person that can change it. Your experience merely reflects your own energetic state of being and level of frequency. That is what you resonate with and that is what your environment is mirroring back to you. Also here – your head will not understand this and will try to keep you in judgment, blame, guilt, shame etc. which will prolong the experience in 3D and 4D. Shift into your heart. FEEL instead of THINK. That is when you immediately feel the change and shift upwards.

Should I stay or should I go now

There are certain periods, when everything is put “On Hold”. You are not able to move on until you have thorougly reviewed your life and your situation. To come into your full authenticity, freedom, and self-love – another prerequisite to shift your frequency up. That means to let go of everything that you do not need anymore for your continued journey. These moments before trustfully entering a wormhole, without knowing what is on the other side, are putting you into introspection. There are no impulses to act, until your perspective has shifted and unnecessary weight has been dropped. Decisions no longer can be taken based on old, outdated beliefs and attachments we still have. This includes outdated spiritual rituals, teachings and routines that absolutely had their purpose in the lower dimensions, but become completely counterproductive now. Also in terms of spiritual wisdom and teachings, all there is left is the openness to endless possibilities before entering that wormhole. Rigidly holding on to “my way is the only right way”, keeps you in a spiral. Be open to expect the unexpected and for surprises that a closed spiritual belief system or teaching would not allow. You can only anchor fully in the higher frequencies, when you have reached complete trust in your own abilities and intuition. If you are still relying on psychics to tell you what your next steps should be, if you are still using spiritual drugs to accelerate your journey and if you are still holding on to routines and rituals to call in guides and angels to channel their wisdom, you mostly do that because you are still coming from a place of mistrust and fear. You are still attached and dependent instead of fully trusting yourself, your own intuition, the energetic flow and the pulls and impulses that come with it.

“If you are still searching for the answers and the saviour outside of you, you are giving away your power and are not standing in your own truth. You are not owning your process and your innate wisdom and gifts. This way, the door to the higher dimensions remains closed”

You are still searching for the answers and the saviour outside of you. You are giving away your power and are not standing in your own truth. You are not owning your process and your innate wisdom and gifts. “Archangel Such and such said this…”  is certainly easier to say and sell than saying. “This is my intuition and truth.” Unfortunately, this way – the door to the higher dimensions remains closed and often you find yourself in an illusionary 4D reality that is mimicking a 5D experience for you – and you do not realize that your spiritual ego is growing here on a day by day basis.

So – let go of anything you used to believe to be true and take a deep look and feel within to find out what truly still serves you when you continue your journey. Be honest where you still have your attachments – the things or people you cannot live without.”

Feeling disconnected and depressed

You are experiencing a timeline split within yourself between the 3D/4D realities and a new higher dimensional timeline. That is why you are flipping back and forth between bliss and confidence and despair and hopelessness.

Moving closer into 5D also brings with it a sense of feeling disconnected. Disconnected from guides, spirits, other people, the planet, the old reality, old routines, your sacred partner….

And that is very normal when dancing your way into 5D and it is actually a very good sign, that you’ve done a really good job in letting go and are coming into your full authenticity. 5D is the dimension of oneness – where you are in tune with unity consciousness all the time, and you become one with all that is. You no longer need to build up a channel to your guides and higher beings in order to receive information from the higher realms.

“In 5D, you no longer need to build up a channel because you are connected  all the time and have simply merged with unity consciousness”

You no longer need to build up a channel for telepathy or to meet your sacred partner in a meditation, because you are connected all the time. But you need to get used to this different quality: It switches to a much more intuitive inner knowing. In the beginning, that feels strange and as if the connection is lost. Instead, you simply have merged with unity consciousness. The timeline split intensifies the feeling of being further apart yet closer than ever. No matter if that relates to your guides, to family and friends or to your sacred partner. You are swinging back and forth between those two reality streams. The swings can get so intense that you feel you can hardly stand it anymore and depression and suicidal tendencies can surface just as much as intense bliss waves.

So the crazy ride you are experiencing right now is perfectly normal and just a sign that you are moving closer to 5D. Use the momentum of the energies available, accept the status of being “on hold” and take the time to revaluate what and who you still truly need and resonate with. Own your process and take responsibility for your own reality. You are creating it with your own energetic frequency. The more you do, the quicker you raise into 5D. And you are always safe and okay when you are trusting the Universal flow.

The texts I share are always based in my own experience and observations. By no means I am claiming this to be the ultimate truth. I encourage everyone to find their own truth and to be open to it changing as new information integrates. As this is universal wisdom of us ALL, I do not claim any copyright. Feel free to utilize and share, as long as you keep the text complete as it is so it keeps its energetic signature. Thanks Vera


  1. Hi Vera! I’ve been enjoying your newsletters for a few months since I found you and today this post really was exactly the support I was searching for when it popped up in my email inbox. I resonated deeply with ALL that you expressed here. I laughed out loud at this: “lying at home and feeling like sh*t is really a big service to the collective and important work!” and that felt really good. Really lifted me back up to a higher vibration again. I feel seen and validated when I read your posts and newsletter and it’s very … healing! Thank you and please keep ’em coming! 😀 <3 With love and light, Roxanne

    1. Roxanne, I totally agree With you! “lying home and feel like sh*t …. ” haha.
      Well, all lightworkers out there; Keep up the good work!!

      Lots of love to all of you

    2. Totally agree Roxanne. It definitely resonated with me. Every word and feeling what a relief to know another understands. Really helps.

      :). Blessings on your journey too

  2. Thank you so much for this one Vera. Actually all of your articles. Every single time i feel im on the ropes, one of your messages comes through and a huge wave of relief and a moment to recalculate myself washes over. Every time! May my vibes reach you with gratitude. Thank you

  3. Absolutely love what you have to say Vera. Explains so much.

    Thank you and keep on going!

    Love and peace,

  4. Oh wow so good to read this its exactly how ive been feeling lately.
    Especially the wanting out and why am I even here questions going thru my mind.
    Thankyou for thr Divine timing of this it now makes so much sense im feeling and doing it for the collective.
    Much love and light to all

  5. This was excatly what I needed to hear, wow. Everything that’s been going on in my life for months makes perfect sense now. Thank you!

  6. This article was a big hit with me and my friend, and my friend even sent it to her cousin in Germany! Thank you, Vera, for helping to steer me back on the better path: “A mind that no longer judges, worries, doubts, interprets or sticks to certain beliefs, but only perceives and sets intentions.”

  7. Wow! That explains a lot!!! I’ve been exactly like this, one day flying high then 3 days when my stomach goes over every morning because of waking up to face another day!
    Today has been a great day and after reading this I’ll not expect the “crash” I’ll just live in the now and accept and just go with the flow 🙂 Thank you, I loved reading this, it really hit home 🙂 xxx

  8. Thank you so much!!! I told my husband you must be walking in my moccasins. This message is exactly what we both have been going through so it does help those feelings of being half crazy part of the time…We are all RIGHT ON, with this swinging energy & I am so grateful to be among those who are leading this energetic way toward a higher life for all. much love to you.

  9. Yup, that sums it all up nicely! Thanks Vera, I am amazed how you can still write these beautiful articles during these energies, I can’t seem to even think straight. 🙂

  10. Thank you Vera. I absolutely love the wisdom you share with all of us.
    A HUGE thank you. Many of your words, as above, have assisted me beyond belief and also helped to validate that the changes I have felt and been experiencing, are exactly what is required for me at this time.
    Reading this download I was able to recognise and know that much of what I’m experiencing now is normal, especially helpful was the line ” In the beginning it feels strange and as if the connection is lost”.
    Profound sharing, and assistance, much love.

  11. Blessings to you Vera and all those who left a comment. The realization that we are not alone going through these shifts and changes, moment by moment, day by day, up and down is wonderful. Thank you for sharing.

  12. Wow, spot on Vera! I’m like yup-yup-yup! Thank you immensely for translating what’s going on with so much clarity. I’ll print this one as I can see myself re-reading it throughout these next weeks especially 🙂


  13. Perfect Timing.. my current heart-mind script interpreted in words read out to me in return. thanks for this Vera. love & light to u 😀

Leave a Reply to Vicki Cancel reply